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IPAD Time Waster: Avakin Life

Avakin Life

Genre: Social

Summary: You have an avatar in which you use to socialize with other people.

Thoughts:

I thought this was a pretty decent game especially if you are into socializing with other human beings.  I did not find the avatars all that great looking and noticed if you wanted to change your look, it would cost some money. At that point, I was just like “Fuck it,” I’ll be ugly. You do start out with an apartment which was unfurnished. I did somehow get a free unicorn and a dog but I am unsure how I did that.  There seemed to be a ton of places to venture off too (Bars, parks, etc) and several events that were also going on.   My first journey was at a bar because I wanted to know if my avatar could get drunk.   I could not figure out how to order anything and then realized that probably cost cash too.  So then, I went to a dog park.  I left my dog at home though.  Time was well spent at the park because I met my first friend, Martin.  (He was wearing a ball gag but seemed very nice) He encouraged me to find a job after I explained to him that I needed a lot of cash to get drunk.  I asked him what kind of jobs were available to a person of my quality.  I told him my interests were stripping and coupon clipping.  He said he would help me find my dream job.  That was exciting news, I had a new friend and would soon be employed and making lots of cash.  After our serious employment chat, I asked Martin to be my mail order bride.  I had to log after that so hopefully, he says yes soon.

Recommend:

I would recommend this game because it is casual and relaxing.  There was no goal to the game other than finding friends. My only real issue was camera movement and walking.  This is a personal issue because I’m really bad at reading directions.

IPAD Time Waster Games: Best Friends

IPAD Time Waster Games: Best Friends

Genre: Puzzles (See Pictures)

Thoughts:

I like this game.  It is well designed, thought provoking and engaging. It does spam the fuck out of you to buy extra content but with all the rewards and bonuses, you don’t actually need to spend a dime on the game. The main dislike to this game is in order to unlock some of the levels, you need to have other Facebook friends that play the game as well. I have not had that issue yet where I could not unlock a level but I could see that if you did not have Facebook, you would not get very far. It’s pretty annoying anyway that you need Facebook friends in order to play a game.  I’m assuming that you would have to pay with your rewards or money to unlock those levels if you had no friends but I have not verified that. Some levels are easy and some levels are challenging with a mix of side quests, there is a good balance. You do have to strategize which I like a lot.

Recommend:

Only if you like puzzle games and have friends that play as well.  I have yet to spend any money on it and have made it to level 157.

Dumpster Fire

I am adding a new section to this site. (See top menu) It is where I will be posting my reviews and other bs at.  I have two sections so far: Netflix Reviews and IPAD Time Waster Games. I will be adding more to this section fairly often in the next coming weeks as most of it is already written. (about 100 lolz.)  Categories to come are: YouTube Melts My Mind – which will be a mixture of videos/people I like and other things that I’m sure somebody was on acid when they made it.  I know this isn’t really an interactive site but if you wanted to contact me with a category, you would like me to toss in the mix – I sure would like to hear from you.   See contact form below.

I suppose I should have a disclaimer so some hipster doesn’t get up in my shit.  My quote aka disclaimer: “My opinion and advice is shit at best. Please, lower your expectations and do not believe at any point in time now or in the future will I provide valuable reading material.  Thank you.” end quote / disclaimer. 

What I have posted so far:

Netflix Reviews:

The Silence

Murder Mystery

IPAD Time Waster Games:

Wonka’s World of Candy

My Cafe

Best Friends 

 

Dear Veruca: My life killing gacha crack addiction

Here is this week’s Dear Veruca! Enjoy!

I’m addicted to gacha.  How can I over come this addiction because I’m really broke?

Answer:  This is a really toughie because I bet your gambling addiction is full fledge right about now. You probably have the night sweats and violent mood swings.  You look over at your real- life lover while they are watching tv and eating a bucket of fried chicken; pondering how to profit from selling their organs.  Each night you can’t sleep.  Your teeth grind together and occasionally, you scream.  You need your goddamn gacha and you need it now.  In that moment, you sit and catch your breath.  You are stunned that your life has been destroyed by fake cartoon toys in a video game.

I’m going to try to help you or at least attempt too:

Therapy:   I hear talking is a good way to deal with your problems.

Medication:  Wipe your gacha addiction away with another addiction.

3rd option:  Quit being a pussy and stop spending your money.

 

I have been in Second Life for a while and I still haven’t met any friends.  Any advice?

Answer:   I think most of Second Life is batshit crazy but when I’m in the mood to find a life long friend; I do this.   I find the most crowded places but not chat hubs.  I stand in the corner looking cool and wait for somebody else who is desperate for a friend to message me.  Then I make them answer like 100 question survey to determine if they are really friendship material or just horny fucks.  If they pass that; I add them to my skype for a 90-day trial period and if they spam me with emoji’s or messages, I immediately block their ass.   I keep starting this process over and over until I find a good egg.  I almost made a connection back in 2007 but it ended as briefly as started.  Good luck.

 

If you have a good question and you need helpful but mediocre advice; send veruca vandyke a note card.

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