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Dumpster Fire: Life Advice

Real advice for desperate people: It’s not good advice – it’s just advice.

I asked a few of my Facebook followers to provide me with some questions & problems that they were in dire need of assistance with.  I decided to share this advice with everybody so I never have to repeat anything again in the future.

 

Question:   My wife and sister argue non-stop at every gathering we go too.  We have to invite both of them or there will be even more drama.  What can we do to get them to stop?

Answer:  It really boils down to who do you like better?  Do you like your wife or your sister?  If the whole family takes a vote and decided who is more likable, the winner will be the one invited to all future family functions.   The loser will be disowned.  If you just want to disqualify somebody without a vote, just research to see if your sister is adopted and problem solved.

Question:  My child is extremely addicted to their IPAD and I have no idea what to do.

Answer: Hide the IPAD in an undisclosed location while they are asleep.  When your little angel wakes up and throws a bitch fit, spray them with a power washer.  You might have to do this for several days until they get their attitude in check.

Question:  I have serious road rage.  I hate being cut off and I just get in a blind fury.  Will drugs help me?

Answer:  I’m sure drugs will help you and keep the roads safer.  (But if  you were that prick behind me this morning, laying on the horn, you can fuck off.)

Question:  I am addicted to male porn but I am not gay.  I’m ashamed to admit it but sausage parties turn me on.

Answer:  You probably are gay with a serious porn addiction.  I would not feel bad about it though because the world is filled with freak shows. If you just go ahead and announce on Facebook, everybody will know and be aware of it. The first few days, you will be mocked non stopped or defriended but after that, everybody will forget or not care. Good luck.

Covet Fashion: Tips for beginners

Tips for beginners:

 

Daily:  Every day, Covet rewards you with 100 diamonds and 20 tickets.

 

Enter daily challenge.:

This is the best challenge to enter everyday because there is no restrictions and you earn $500 covet cash just for entering.

I like this one because I can put on any unworn outfit and enter.  I don’t ever expect a high score with this one since I’m using whatever outfit I have but eventually that daily 500 cash adds up!

Flashback Challenges:

If you are a beginner and low on funds, do not enter the flash back challenges.  These challenges can be really expensive!

The flashback challenges require several pieces from previous seasons and if you do not have those items, you will have to buy them.

Jet Set Challenges:

You can do the jet set challenges as many times as you want.

You do not earn prizes with these challenges but you do earn stars.  Stars will help you unlock other jet set levels and you can earn 500 diamonds.

Jet Set Challenges usually only last 8 hours and voting begins.  So you find out results pretty quick. These challenges are also easy to win.

Series Challenges:

If you have the funds to spend, do the series challenges.  These are like 5 to 8 challenges.

If you do all of them, the prizes are really good and this is only for entering them all!

The only thing that really sucks as a beginner, you usually have to buy 2 to 4 pieces per challenge.

Borrow:

You can borrow items from Facebook friends and if you are in a fashion house – you can borrow them too.

You can only borrow 1 item per challenge.

Style:

Pairing the right hair and makeup can bring up the score of your look when it comes to voters.

Eventually, in higher levels, details are going to be very important. (Jewelry, handbags, etc.)

I noticed short hair and albino skin do not do well in voting.  Voters tend to like long hair and tanned/darker skin tones. (Just my opinion though)

You can view the top looks on the front page and that will give you a good idea on how people vote.  I noticed a lot of voters have shit taste too.  I don’t know why.

Diamonds:

If you are going to buy diamonds, wait until Covet Fashion has a sale.  They have a lot of sales!

Challenge Themes:

All the challenges have some sort of theme going on.  Pay attention to the picture and the description of the theme.

Many voters will not vote for your look if it resembles nothing to the theme.

Funds:

Save your funds and only buy what you need for a challenge.  Items cost an arm and a leg and you will run out of money very quickly.

When you do have to buy something, keep in mind that you might need that outfit in another challenge.  Pick items that can be paired with other things.

Likes:

Likes do nothing to help you.  It just shows that somebody thought your outfit was cool.  It does not help with voting.

Unworn & Season:

Max your unworn & season bonus if you can.  This can put a 3.5 score outfit over 4.0 which will land you a prize.

Edit:

You can edit an outfit up until it’s closed out for voting.   This is handy if you don’t have the covet cash to buy something.  Enter the challenge anyway, get the entry reward and then edit the outfit and buy the item you need with it.

Tucking in Shirts:

There is a tuck button that will tuck in a shirt.  This will give your outfit an entirely different look and is helpful if a lot of people are going to be wearing the same look and you want to set yourself apart.

Models:

You can switch from classic to modern models as many times as you want.  If you entered a challenge with one type of model, you have to stay with the model until the challenge is over.

Pro Tip:

Do not try to enter every challenge.  This game can be addicting and you can end up paying a lot of real money to play it.  Start with the Jet Set & Daily Challenges. Save your diamonds and $500 covet cash for a few days and then enter another challenge.  Pacing yourself is key.

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